Uncle Roger's Notebooks of Daily Life


My life is, to me, ripe with frequent challenges, occasional successes, spontaneous laughter, adequate tears, and enough *life* to last me a lifetime. To you, however, it surely seems most pedestrian. And therefore, I recycle the name I used previously and call this my Notebooks of Daily Life. Daily, because it's everyday in nature, ordinary. These conglomeration of events that are my life are of interest to me because I live it, perhaps mildly so to those who are touched by it, and could only be of perverse, morbid curiosity to anyone else. Yet, I offer them here nonetheless. Make of them what you will, and perhaps you can learn from my mistakes.


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Thursday, August 28, 2008

The Shy Cow - Run while you can

Over at ParentDish, this week, the Daily Dish topic is jokes for kids and, while I wouldn't subject the readers there to this, I thought it important to preserve for posterity my mother's Shy Cow joke. This is a joke that she made up and considered it quite clever. I suspect she was alone in that assessment. None the less, in the perhaps misguided attempt to make the internet as complete as possible, here then, after the break, is the Shy Cow joke, as I remember it. I beseech you, do not click on the "Read More..." link, whatever you do.

I warned you. Turn back now! If you got here via a direct link, I apologize and advise you to hit the back button now. If you continue reading, well, may God have mercy on your soul.

Farmer Brown was having a problem with someone stealing from his barn where the cows lived. Each day, the cows would go out to pasture and when they came home in the evening, something would be gone. Farmer Brown decided to keep the barn locked, but he didn't want to have to unlock it every time one of the cows arrived back at the barn. So he decided to give each cow her own key. He got the lock installed and gave a key to each cow, admonishing them not to lose them.

One cow in particular was extremely shy, and was almost too shy to go up to the farmer to collect her key. She forced herself, however, and put the key around her neck where she wouldn't lose it. Alas, lose it she did and, being so very shy, was afraid to tell the farmer. She avoided the issue by simply making sure she was never the last one back to the barn so that she could get in with one of the other cows.

This worked all well and good until one winter's evening when she lost track of time and arrived at the barn after all the other cows had let themselves in. Naturally, she was too shy to knock on the barn door to have one of the other cows let her in, so she stood outside all night long. Sadly, that night, a fierce storm blew in and the shy cow froze to death.

The farmer found her the next morning still standing there by the barn door. Shaking his head he looked at the other cows and asked, "What happened to the Shy Cow's key?"

See? I told you. What has been read cannot be unread. Sorry.

(If you don't get it, think about your Russian composers.)

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