Uncle Roger's Notebooks of Daily Life
My life is, to me, ripe with frequent challenges, occasional successes, spontaneous laughter, adequate tears, and enough *life* to last me a lifetime. To you, however, it surely seems most pedestrian. And therefore, I recycle the name I used previously and call this my Notebooks of Daily Life. Daily, because it's everyday in nature, ordinary. These conglomeration of events that are my life are of interest to me because I live it, perhaps mildly so to those who are touched by it, and could only be of perverse, morbid curiosity to anyone else. Yet, I offer them here nonetheless. Make of them what you will, and perhaps you can learn from my mistakes.
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Thursday, August 11, 2005
How do you punish your children if you don't believe in corporal punishment? We don't spank our kids, so what can we do when they misbehave? What punishment can we hang over their heads to prevent misbehaviour in the first place?
When I was growing up, I knew that if I did something sufficiently bad, I would get a spanking. This could range anywhere from a light spanking all the way up to a wire coat hanger on bare buttocks. (Believe you me, that hurts!) So I did my best not to do things I shouldn't do.
Fast forward to now and I don't believe that violence is a good way to discipline a child; it teaches them that violence is a viable solution to a situation. So what can I do? How do I prevent my kids from doing naughty things?
In the past, we've used the threat of the gate -- for some reason, Jared hated having the safety gate put up across his doorway, even well after he was able to get over it. The latest is the threat of taking his Mickey away -- a stuffed Mickey Mouse that he is rarely without. We've done the same with his toy cars. I tell him I'm going to count to three and if he doesn't -- whatever -- I'm going to take his Mickey away. Most of the time, I don't get past two, but sometimes he doesn't care.
We also do the time-out sort of thing (though we don't call it that.) We tell him to sit on his bed or in the corner or on his chair and think about what he's done. He doesn't like that, but I'm not entirely sure how terribly effective it is as a deterrent.
So I ask... How does one effectively punish kids when one doesn't believe in corporal punishment?